time

Saw an interesting movie last nite, ‘The Lake House’, with Sandra Bullock & Keanu Reeves. It used a fascinating concept where the two people are separated by two years and connect via a ‘time warp’ letter box, the lake house and a scrawny dog called Jack. Time & timing in relationship was obviously the central theme?

The Lake House

Bullock’s character Kate was 2 years ahead of Reeves character, Alex and suggested early in the movie:

‘It’s kind of a long distance relationship.’

During the movie, it frustrated the life out of me that she missed so many opportunities that could have facilitated them meeting. Poor ol’ Alex seemed to have to take responsibility for their connection (as he was living in the past). It was only when the penny dropped for Kate that she started paying attention and then they managed to meet for real!

Alex: ‘This house is about connections.’

Moral of the story: be careful not to be too far ahead of yourself in a relationship that you miss the other person & the connection!

Timing in a relationship requires that we pay attention to the other, as well as ourselves. In the movie the couple managed to bridge time through their letters: so reading & really listening to each other. I find that writing important stuff creates the space for me to really say what is on my mind, without the other person’s needs/issues getting in the way and then I can be really clear & honest. Of course, then it is great to get the other person’s feedback & really listen to that too without taking any of it personally. It’s all about clear communication, often difficult when we are trying to grab a few minutes out of our schedule.

As a radio announcer said to me once: “We do everything in short sound bites on air. At home even when my wife wants to talk about our relationship, I say to her jokingly ‘OK, you’ve got 2 minutes to cover that!’ “

Seriously though it is amazing the effect of listening to someone, can have on them and of course on those doing the listening! The experience can be one of deep contentment and peace & promotes warm feelings at the very least, if not Love. It is such a reaffirming experience of being seen and understood as who you really are – precious!

Important note: remember though that listening does not require any fixing or changing!

Kate again: ‘I sometimes feel as if I’m invisible, as if no one can see me at all. I never felt that way when I lived at the Lake House.’

Love puppy

Meanwhile in Japan: a chihuahua was born with a heart shaped mark on its coat. It is reputed that everyone who sees him becomes lucky and so to cover all angles here it is! Have a lucky week.

Heres a funny video about bad timing, enjoy…..

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