success means different things for different people and it is great if both partners in a relationship have similar definitions. The word success meaning “result, outcome,” comes from the Latin successus ‘an advance, succession, happy outcome’. The combined effort of more than one person, can certainly contribute to easier, more sustained success than one person solo. Success can be very tangible & solid or it can be much more subtle depending on the type of success that is desired. There are four main categories of success are:

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the biggest challenge in matching a couple is to match each individual’s requirement for commitment. The word commit comes from Latin committere “to bring together” from com- “together” & mittere “to put, send”. It seems to be an integral & important ingredient in making any relationship long term and to give it staying power. The big ‘C’ word is what scares a lot of people, particularly men, but if we have nothing binding us together, a relationship will slowly fade away. However the reality is that we all have different ideals and images about what commitment means for us and this is not often addressed.

‘A bride at her second marriage does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.’ Helen Rowland

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sex sells, so they say. I’m not sure about that although most ad agencies would probably disagree! It certainly makes the world go around as it guarantees that most species on the planet will be perpetuated. In relationships it also provides us humans with an intense level of intimacy, release of pent up energy and a source of lotsa fun! However we all express our sexuality in different ways and have different needs in that area.

There are four broad categories in sexual expression and needs which are as follows:

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we have all experienced chemistry with someone else and in spite of this widespread experience, we are not sure about exactly what it is or how it happens.  Online dating sites try to determine it, because if this element is missing in a relationship, then it may easily fizzle or not happen at all! Everyone knows it by its absence or presence but most have no idea where it comes from. Match.com even created a site called Chemistry.com which attempts to determine this element in a dating site. The site is based on Dr Helen Fisher’s research into why people are attracted to each other. The thing I notice about all the theories about chemistry between people is that what is often not recognized is that chemistry is a different sort of experience for different sorts of folks. It seems there is even a movie around called The Chemistry of Dating.

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When matchmaking, one of the major issues that needs to be addressed between two people is how comfortable they feel with each other. This is particularly crucial if the relationship may progress towards a live in setup. When sharing the same living space lack of comfort for either person can result in troubles within the relationship. When we are at home, we need to be able to feel comfortable and relaxed. It is a basic need and is the foundation for everything else in our lives. People have 4 basic different types of comfort needs and most of us would relate to one of these, at least generally.

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