perfect match couple: are the odds stacked against you?

these days the odds seem stacked against finding a perfect match couple when looking for a relationship.  It seems we can be attracted to a person’s smell (see my post Smelly Love) or their hormones (Different Strokes for Different Sites) or their genes (Review of GenePartner compatibility test) or even their taste in music (ASoundMatchdotcom Relationship Assessment Review).  And there are still no guarantees that you will have a perfect match couple.

“Despair is perfectly compatible with a good dinner, I promise you.” William M. Thackeray

The simplest solution is to find an objective party that can see a bit clearer than yourself and doesn’t have all these hormones & genes pulling you madly into a match that may not be the best thing for you.  A matchmaker has hopefully expertise, experience and the blessing of facilitating good matches for couples and can make bring objectivity into a usually very instinctual arrangement.  Hopefully there is less waking up in the morning wondering ‘wot in the hell am I doing with this person?’

“There are strange flowers of reason to match each error of the senses.” Louis Aragon

I looked up matchmaker in Wikipedia and found only a very small amount of history behind the ancient profession of matchmaking as per below:

In some cultures, the role of the matchmaker was and is quite professionalized. The Ashkenazi Jewish shadchan, or the Hindu astrologer, were often thought to be essential advisors and also helped in finding right spouses as they had links and a relation of good faith with the families. In cultures where arranged marriages were the rule, the astrologer often claimed that the stars sanctified matches that both parents approved of, making it quite difficult for the possibly-hesitant children to easily object – and also making it easy for the astrologer to collect his fee. Tarot divination has also been employed by some matchmakers.

and

Shadchan (Shadchonim plural) is a Hebrew word for matchmaker.  Judaism has found that a good match or couple is most likely to be people with the same, or very similar, backgrounds. Therefore, a matchmaker is most likely to be someone who is familiar with both sides and is in a position to introduce the interested parties to each other.

“All of us failed to match our dreams of perfection. So I rate us on the basis of our splendid failure to do the impossible.” William Faulkner

Another article in Reuters Matchmakers find business booming on Wall Street below:

Raoul Felder, a high-profile divorce lawyer, said there had been a spike in divorces as the economy started to tank because “a lot of mice want to leave the sinking ship.”  He forecast there would be more when the economy picks up but said for the moment, there is a lull because financial uncertainty makes couples think twice about embarking on a potentially costly divorce.  ”It’s a bit like buying futures because divorce takes eight months to a year to be finalized,” he said. “You’re really guessing what’s going to be happening eight to 12 months away.”

“There aren’t many irritations to match the condescension which a woman metes out to a man who she believes has loved her vainly for the past umpteen years.” Edward Hoagland

In Ireland where I have lived, there are still traditional matchmakers & matchmaking festivals in some country villages.  You can listen to my interviews with traditional Irish matchmakers Tom Fenney and his son in law Gus Martyn from County Meath, Ireland.  Or if you prefer you can read the transcripts of the interviews here.  I went to the Lisdoonvarna Matchmaking Festival but was unable to arrange a meet with the local matchmaker there but you can see a funny interview that I did in the pub below:

“Men know that women are an over-match for them, and therefore they choose the weakest or most ignorant. If they did not think so, they never could be afraid of women knowing as much as themselves.” Samuel Johnson

I read this week on AllFacebook Blog that Facebook Removes Ability To Search Based On Relationship Status This will make it more difficult for members to mix & match on this social network.  Even though it is hit & miss with no matchmaker available to offer advice on matches, the social networks have a more natural model to meet & match with others.  Everyone is in a social context rather than cut off from their world as per online dating sites.  Friends can spontaneously play the part of matchmaker on these sites as they do in real life.  Social networks are places where people gather to share what interests them and so these days are the parallel to communities of the past.  It can be lonely & cut off from real life trying to find a partner on online dating sites.

“The lives of most men are patchwork quilts. Or at best one matching outfit with a closet and laundry bag full of incongruous accumulations.” Jesse Owens

The other means of matchmaking is through astrology and you can view your general zodiac matches through my post how do you match with other zodiac signs? There are links on that page to my zodiac couple matching for love & work on horoscopes.co.uk .  Of course there is a lot more complexity to my astrological matching algorithm but this is a good start to show the potential of astrology in matching.  The great bonus is that astrology can address all facets of two people and therefore has more potential indicating a good match.

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• Cheesy Headline Alert: Can “The Last Matchmaker” Teach Us About Love? [Matchmaker Matchmaker] (jezebel.com)
• Fed up South Florida singles turning to professional matchmakers (pbpulse.com)
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